roxybisquaint: (sarah germs)
After lengthy negotiations with my home, that at times bordered on hostile, the house cleaning strike has officially come to an end. No longer am I staring at rugs that need vacuuming, dusty tables, paper that needs recycling or belongings that need putting away. It's done. We're clean in here.

I wish I could say I won this battle, but the CHFPC (Coalition of House, Furnishings, Possessions and a Cat) had the upper hand from the start. It knew I couldn't hold out forever. And so my demands, for the house to produce less "old house dust", the rugs to tuft-up less wool, the cat to stop shedding and leaving paw prints on the bathroom sink, incoming mail to sort itself, boxes to break down and recycle on their own, and belongings to put themselves away, were not met. Not a single one. In fact, the CHFPC issued the following statement:

Screw you!

So there you have it.
roxybisquaint: (sarah bombs)
Q: What do I do with this?

Even as my house cleaning strike pretty much continues in the main living part of the house, I've decided to delve into the underworld. Yes, the basement — shelter of all possessions homeless. You don't even want to know what I've found down here under layers of dust. Anyone need some Camel cash? How about a selection of dry-rotted rubber bands? Want an old checkbook (one of those big notebook style business ones) to a closed account? Perhaps some miscellaneous screws and electronic parts? The real waste of space, though, is stacks of old postal forms and boxes. I have the mother load of Priority boxes, Express Mail tape, customs forms and the like (from the old action figure business). So anyway, I'm covered in filth at the moment and I thought I'd share that.

By the way, how many flashlights are too many to have? Is 7 too many? What's the limit on partial gallons of paint for a household? Is 31 excessive? Do I really need my old crutches? Why do I have a Razor scooter? Is it decadent to have his and hers power tools? Actually, I'm going to answer that one: I don't care. Milwaukee is too heavy for me. I need my Ryobi. It would, however, be most helpful if either of us ever put them away.

While you ponder all that, I'll leave you with a more important Q&A:

Q: What happens when Van Halen's Jump, Yes' Owner of a Lonely Heart and Starship's We Built This City get mixed together?

A: Compliments of my brother's mad mixing skillz...

In other news, my husband just informed me that WarGames 2: The Dead Code was "a steaming pile of crap."

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Roxy Bisquaint

March 2011

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